The mummy-mafia: judgement

On the board of expecting mothers and mothers for toddlers and babies the discussion often occurs: pain-free birth or natural and my current due-group is no exception. I salute the women who give birth naturally but it's not something I would want to try, with Quinten I was in labour for 21 hours, he got stuck and was taken by suction-cup .... so no thanks - I'll take anything they have to offer and you know what, I do not feel one bit like a bad mother or less of a woman for it. Sure some think you miss out of the huge rush of feeling the baby come out but it's not something I have to say I craved after being awake for over 30 hours.
Now comes to the breastfeeding, a mafia of itself. I do understand why it's important for the child to get the first milk and for the bond and closeness to the mother but honestly, if formula was so bad for the baby it would be on prescription. Quinten is not damaged (as far as I can see) nor is he unable to bond with me (he's a friggin velcro-baby) And to be honest, apart from getting rid of the pain of breastfeeding, it was nice to be able to let papa take a feeding shift so I could get some much needed sleep.
On the topic of food we enter a whole world of 'do's and 'don't's and no matter how many people you ask, they always know better and what you're doing is not completely right. Funny thing is: most children survive their parent's choice of food for them.
"Just let him cry" It was an advice that, in the end of the colic period, was enough to make me plot murder and it's still given to me when Q wakes up crying during the night. My baby-nurse is sure that he would just go back to sleep. Yeah right! The problem is, for me, that I do not believe that babies and children are evil plotters who try and rob their parents (mothers) of sleep and energy. When a child cries there is a reason for it, hunger, being tired, needing a hug and so on... all of which I think are important to provide for your child. True, at some point, I am sure a child cries just because they have no idea what else to do, they are bored or just confused about it all but then isn't it the parent's job to help them figure things out? And a hug never hurt anyone :P